Dating her

There are no good stories about women's lives that are ongoing, that aren’t about the moment of walking down the aisle or having a baby coming down the birth canal.

Zan: And there’s no good dating advice, really, either, right?

At first I found it kind of devastating; I thought, .

But even friends who are in great marriages, stuff happens.

Glynnis: When I'm traveling, I get on Tinder or whatever the dating app in Europe is and make dates with people.

The fact that we shame women for thinking about it like that is also unfair.

Because there's nothing you can do in life that's going to solve everything for you, including children and marriage. Zan: That's what you're looking forward to!

Particularly when we're so raised on storytelling, and everything being wrapped up at some point, it's easy to think: when does it get tied up so I can stop thinking about it? It's a really scary, really hard way to think about it, to think: There's not gonna be the moment that fixes, solves or changes everything. This idea that there's a solution has been so ingrained in women's heads in every way possible. Glynnis: Every time I find myself feeling bad about my own life, I think about the centuries and centuries of women who would have committed murder to not have to go out on a date; to be able to have dinner on their own or have a paycheck that they didn't have to share, or have the amount of children they wanted or didn't want.

This is a conversation between two straight, white women, so there’s tons not covered here, but hopefully it will help you sort through how you think about your own love life in your 30s.

Zan: What was the most recent date you went on, and how did it come about?

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